Written by blog contributor, Tammy Luksich.
Webster’s Dictionary defines perseverance as steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success. Perseverance is the breaking point, which drives the car of maturity and success. It separates the mediocre from the overachievers, the B+ from the A-, the laborer from the foreman. The process of developing perseverance is also a large undertaking, but if properly executed, can help open the doors of opportunity, learning, and growth.
So, why does this matter? Why should anyone really care about “developing” this steadfastness? The answer is simple: goals, progress, and achievement. If you’re someone that wants to improve your health, fitness, career, relationships, hobbies, or efficiency, chances are you’ve established some mental fortitude to guide the process. However, like most great stories, nothing ever happens according to plan. Forgetting to pack gym clothes, eating fast food, difficult bosses, mean, insecure, shitty people can create significant difficulties with achieving “said” goal.
Roadblocks vs. Speed Bumps
If an individual does not have a strong background in intellectual depth, challenges such as these are seen as roadblocks instead of speed bumps. The first step in developing a strong mental capacity is evaluating what messages you’re consuming and the effect of those messages.
I’ve always been confused as to why jealousy prevents some individuals from celebrating the success of others. Nevertheless, haters come in all shapes and sizes and typically work overtime to keep you from achieving your goals and robbing you of your purpose. Don’t let them. Don’t listen. Someone will always have an opinion on how they think you should do something. Deception is among one of the worst culprits of manipulation, because the “advice” isn’t sincere.
Crabs in a Bucket
If you have a lofty goal such as participating in an Ironman triathlon or helping build a well in a third-world country, plenty of people will try to set up roadblocks and flood you with negativity. The best advice for this type of treatment is dodge and cover. Just kidding, kinda… If this negative energy is preventing you from moving forward, I would most definitely avoid these individuals or limit your time with them. Similar to crabs in a bucket mentality, first coined by writer Ninotchka Rosca, Rosca points out crabs can easily escape from the pot, individually, but instead choose to grab each other and prevent escape by ensuring a collective demise. It’s often paired with the malevolent phrase, “If I can’t have it, neither can you.”
It’s your fault.
Another pitfall many goal-seekers fall into includes playing the blame game. It’s easy to blame aspects beyond your control as the reason for not achieving “x.” It’s one thing to articulate variables that may influence your goal-route, but completely preventing progress toward a goal is a cop out. Winners make it happen. Winners get creative with their approach and look at roadblocks as opportunities for improvement, learning lessons, eye-opening experiences that make them better. One example of a classy winner is Holly Holm. In the weeks leading up to UFC 193 Championship fight against Ronda Rousey, Holm did not once fall into the trash-talking trap of her opponent.
ICYMI, here’s a refresher:
Holm’s victory was made much sweeter when she knocked Rousey out in the second round with a head kick. In fact, the fight is considered one of the biggest upsets in the history of sports, giving Rousey a broken jaw to match her shitty attitude. Fast forward to March 5, 2016; Holm’s lost the title to Miesha Tate, who choked Holm out in the fifth round. This is what Holly had to say two days later to the world…
In summary, there are a few things that differentiate the leaders from the followers and that is charge over those speed bumps even if they screw up your tires, hug your haters, celebrate the success of others, don’t blame someone or something else for your faults, and rise above. It will take extra work, practice, patience, and fortitude, but classiness is one thing that never goes out of style.